Dog Free Zones

I wondered how I was going to write this blog as it is something that is extremely personal to me and I’ll explain why as we go, but I didn’t want it to come across as controversial. In the end I decided to write from the heart and be open and honest. For the record this is just my opinion.

Why did I want to write about Dog Free Zones?
My daughter, who is now 10, for the last eight years has had a phobia of dogs. I don’t know how it happened but it did and has since got progressively worse, it has also been passed onto other animals over the years. I understand phobias are not pleasant for anyone but when you have a learning difficulty, as in Down Syndrome, calm rationality is not even an option.

Over the years I have seen Ellie have a melt down on more than one occasion. I have seen her shake from head to foot, scream the place down and cry in hysteria. It has not been pleasant to watch and has caused the family great concern. We live in a lovely area that has many fields, parks and pubs that are dog friendly so knew it was important to get a handle on this.

As time has gone on, depending on Ellie’s emotional needs some days she can actually stand still, stay calm and let a dog walk past her, some days she can run past dogs cheering herself on for being so brave, but there are still days that involve emotions which result from having a phobia.

So why am I writing this? 
I am writing this quite simply because Ellie is not the only child to have a phobia of dogs. Ellie does not have a phobia of dogs because she has Down Syndrome, many other children have this phobia too and I wanted to let all the dog owners out there understand what can be happening when you walk past with your dog and see a child screaming.

Actions and Considerations
First, please consider that a child is literally petrified of your dog, therefore saying “She won’t hurt, just pat it” and bringing your nice dog nearer to said child, doesn’t actually help. Please ensure your dog is on a lead if in a public place, I personally was told by the police that in all public spaces, all dogs must be kept on a lead and it is a criminal offence not do so. A good friend shared this link with me, which clearly states that in public spaces that have PSPO’s, a dog must be on a lead.

https://www.gov.uk/control-dog-public/public-spaces-protection-orders

Other actions to consider if you have a dog with you, is that if you are asked to put your dog on a lead because a child is frightened (just for a few minutes), please don’t ignore it. If a restaurant or park has a sign saying ‘No Dogs’ please don’t take your dog in there. My daughter has seen her brother get jumped by a dog, her brother be chased by a dog and a dog ran that ran that close to her one day, off a lead, that she pushed it away.

I understand this is a work in progress for our family and I know there is wider support out there such as The Dogs Trust but for now, please be considerate as we will too.

https://www.dogstrust.org.uk/sponsor/?msclkid=2e2f50c041721c28b5b80dd251230f51&utm_source=bing&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=SD%7CAudience%7CPB%7CExact&utm_term=dogs%20trust&utm_content=Brand%7CPure&gclid=CK-pq47OhOMCFY2bGwoderQAgQ&gclsrc=ds

Information relating to The Dogs Trust

If you are in the same situation as my family, here are some places that are dog free that you can attend and enjoy

• Most beaches on the Isle of Wight (during the summer) are dog free
• Most beaches in West Wales have summertime dog bans (eg Saundersfoot, Tenby)
• RSPB Old Moor in Wath upon Dearne
• Cleethorpes Beach is dog free between Good Friday and 30th September
• Butlins
• Haven Burnham on Sea
• Fairthorne Manner in Botley Hampshire
• Brockholes
• Lytham St Anne’s beach in the summer
• Lytham St Anne’s beach in the summer

I hope as always you have found this useful and I would love to hear from you if you have any coping mechanisms or know of any Dog Free Zones that I can add to my list.
Thank you as always for reading and if you would like to connect with me through any social media platforms please click on the button

Connect Here

Until Next Time
Sharon x

First blog post

Hi and here we are with my own very first blog post, it’s October 18th 2017 and I have been wanting to blog for so long so to say I’m excited is an understatement.

Who am I?

I am Sharon, a mum of 2, Full Time Carer to my eldest and I gave up my teaching career four years ago when my daughter started school. More on that to come.

Why Blog?

Well I’ve been in Network Marketing for 2 years now and I wanted to share my experience, what I’ve learned along the way with you as well as my trials and tribulations on my journey as a mum.

My mission is to inspire both my children and you to be the best you can be, whatever that means for you.

Say Hi and I’m looking forward to sharing more with you.

Sharon 

Time To Believe

Week 13 of 2023 and I’ve been so confused over the last few months…… once again that feeling of who am I, what am I here to do. I’ve been wanting to write for sometime but after over thinking it, the blocks came. Today I start. It’s an energy 3 day in Numerology (something I have been studying) on a Wednesday, which is ruled by the planet Mercury which is all about communication so what a great day to start.

Please, let me introduce myself, I often feel everyone knows me and knows all about me so this is for any new readers. I’m Sharon, FT Carer to my daughter, mum to 2 and happily married.

I am currently reading several books on the go as I set myself a goal, not something I do often but to read 50 books this year. As I picked up May Cause Miracles by Gabrielle Bernstein, the paragraph stated “Today I am willing to see things differently. Today I am willing to change my mind.” and that is what caused me to log in to WordPress and write. That’s all it takes isn’t it.

I’m a huge believer in leaning into what you want from the day and how your energy is and that is what I love about Numerology, each day carries a universal energy vibe and today is a 3, I’m currently in personal 3 year too; The Creative Expressionist which is all about as it say, getting creative, having fun, bringing the inner child back out and laughing, dancing, writing or listening to music. I’ve never seen myself as a Creative, I can’t cook or paint or sing for that matter but I’ve been drawn to writing and I love reading…..

I am also reading The Magic by Rhonda Byrne, have you read it? It’s powerful and writing the gratitude down each morning isn’t easy but I am going to persevere…..

So this is a short introduction to me, I need to shoot as I’m about to go and deliver a new training on Master Numbers….. I’ll be back again soon. Thanks for reading

Sharon x

Secret Summer Holidays to Enjoy with Down Syndrome

Summer holidays are something to look forward too, aren’t they?
When you have a child with Down Syndrome you may just wish to consider a few other things before booking. If you are anything like me your holiday choices come with a list as long as your arm in addition to sunshine and cost from

• Daytime flights (Ellie will not fall asleep on a plane)
• Not to far from the airport (as my children are young the quicker we get there the better)
• No hills to climb (this would just cause a lot more energy)
• 2 bedroomed accomodation (Ellie fights her sleep unless she realises it’s bedtime)

The Lanyard Explained
Have you got yours?
I only found out about this recently and I think it is a fabulous service offered. The lanyard helps all airport staff assist a child with a disability (including unseen ones) and the family with extra support including reduced queuing times. This is perfect for children with Down Syndrome who just don’t comprehend the reason for queuing or have little patience to do so. I have since heard that Manchester Airport has now opened The Sunflower Room which helps those families that need to avoid noise and crowds because of their disability.

The Lanyard

Holiday Secrets
Each child and family are unique in what they are looking for from a holiday but you may find that when one destination fits you revisit it time and time again. I personally have found that Greece is ideal for us a family. Usually a family run hotel in a quiet area with the sea nearby and it must have a pool. Other places highly recommended by other parents include

• Orchard Holiday Park in the Isle of Wight
• Golden Valley in Derbyshire for camping
• Butlins in Skegness
• Centre Parcs
• Lake District
• Loch Lomond in Scotland
• Florida
• Newquay Wales
• Menorca
• Ribby Hall in St. Anne’s
• Haven and Park Dean holidays camps in Dorset
• EuroDisney
• Canaries
• Portugal

If you would like to see where you can get free admission as a carer, please refer to my previous blog
https://wordpress.com/block-editor/post/sharoncrowley.wordpress.com/907

Your Journey
What I love about children with Down Syndrome is that their likes and dislikes are all different so what will work for one child might not another. This is my own experience when we’re travelling, first I like to pre-warn Ellie of what we are doing and what is going to happen. When she was younger I would show her pictures of a plane or a video of a campsite so that she knew what to expect. Her Ipad is like her right arm as Ellie doesn’t enjoy crafts, so I will download as many video’s/games/educational apps as possible and ensure it is fully charged. We often carry a charge pack and ear phones too. Ellie amused me early on with plane journeys as she absolutely loved the butterflies we all experience with turbulence, I on the other hand do not!
I also ensure there are plenty of treats/food and drinks to hand.

Finally
I always take plenty of relevant medicine on our family holidays including Calpol and Piriton which have come in handy with bites and high temperatures and whilst it is no longer needed, in previous years I have had to inform our travel insurance where we were going as Ellie has a VSD.
Now there is no talk of surgery and no medication, this is no longer relevant so always find out with your travel insurance what do they need to be aware of.

I hope you have found this article useful. I would love to know if you holiday regularly to the same destination so I can add it to my list or if you are an inclusive holiday that would like to share your destination.

As always, thank you for reading and until next time
Sharon x

Self Care for a Carer

Self Care, what is that I hear you say? Well let’s talk about why self care is important and those little activities that you can incorporate into your every day life to take some time out from being a carer and should put a smile on your face.

Let’s start with what is self care? I have to admit, in my humble opinion, I believe self care has become a ‘buzz word’ of today that has been recently created but I still feel it is extremely important for survival as a human being, even more so as a parent and vital as a carer.

A definition of self care – the practice of taking action to preserve or improve one’s own health.

Now, how important was that for you to hear, ‘improve one’s health.’ As a carer you have to spend a lot of time looking after someone else’s health and needs; either older or younger and in addition to your own health and more often than not your own family.

Don’t get to this

Why is self care important? You may have heard the phrase if you’re running on empty how can you help others’ and that really is the simplicity of it. You cannot complete your role as a carer from your sick bed. Therefore it is vital to stay as healthy as you can and understand when it is time to take a step back here is what one mum said recently about self care.

I got myself into this really negative place where I’d just feel guilty and shit, that I wasn’t doing enough all the time. I’d get stressed super quickly because I put myself under so much pressure, then shout, then feel more rubbish and so on.

So I consciously took a step back and really focused on all the stuff I do that’s great, or even just the stuff that’s OK, normal stuff! We do so much every day that takes physical and mental effort but I definitely only focused on all the stuff I thought I wasn’t doing x

Next let’s look at what activities can be classed as self care and whilst some of these activities might seem unusual even ordinary to you, they do work for a few parents that I know. Self care is vital and it needs doing regularly for both our health and our sanity. There were several categories that were considered ordinary to turn to from crocheting, to hitting the gym, to even enjoying the (occasional or daily) glass of wine. Reading was another important wind down whether done before bed or sat in the car whilst playing taxi service.

Other additional self care activities that some might not even consider activities were watching the TV, simply eating, getting a decent sleep, having a shower or even a warm cuppa. Some considered more extravagant self care activities from pamper massages, spa breaks to drinking champagne and even hitting the beach. Gardening, horse riding, singing and yes it was said ‘locking yourself in the bathroom’ (we have all been there!), were many of the activities chosen from carers, hopefully there will be one that will suit you too.

Whatever activities you do decide on, choose to do some daily, some weekly and some less often, but do them. These self care activities will help you, maybe slightly, help your health, reduce your stress as a carer and just maybe put a smile on your face.

• 

  From @journeysofawoman.com

 

As always, thank you for reading and I hope you have found some value in this. I would love to know if you leave a comment, what your favourite self care activity is or message me directly via any of the links @linktr.ee/shaz_crowley

Until Next Time
Sharon x

Those First Few Days to Help You with a Child who has Down Syndrome

Are you a first time parent to a child with Down Syndrome? You may have known about the diagnosis during your pregnancy or found out afterwards, like I did….either way I would strongly suggest turning off google, putting any leaflets away you’ve been given by the professionals and read on. This blog is for you and is not just written from my own personal experience but from shared parenting secrets to you from many that have been in your shoes.

Congratulations, you have a newborn! Now if like me this child is your first you’ve probably got ready or possibly even read the ‘parenting handbooks’. Put them away in a drawer for now, even if your newborn is not your first child; grab a brew and read these top tips that many parents of a child with Down Syndrome begin with

‘treat your child like you would any other child, through each and every stage. See past the diagnoses, love and discipline just as you would your oldest’

Ellie, days old

Enjoy your beautiful baby as that is what you have in front of you, a beautiful baby.
Stop worrying, stop reading and stop googling; take each day forward and when you’re ready to learn more; consider joining a supportive group such as
https://www.facebook.com/groups/801281006738525/?
to ask any questions you have from those that have lived through them.

Another main point that many parents agreed was to enjoy every minute, like everyone else your child will grow up just as quick. My daughter Ellie has just turned 10 and I feel like I’ve blinked. Additionally in those first few days and maybe even longer don’t refuse help; you may be emotional about having a newborn even without having a diagnosis of Down Syndrome, so don’t try and play super-parent and do everything, take help when offered. The storm of emotions you will be going through will pass and things will get easier, we all promise you that. Just breathe and hold your baby.

Be kind to yourself and one thing that personally worked for me was talking to my husband openly and honestly about how I was feeling. Emotions such as sadness, concerns, worrying too much about the future; you may even have health problems (Ellie has a hole in the heart) but don’t be scared and don’t look too far ahead. Cuddle and ‘squish’ your baby and enjoy the magical journey that you are on.

As your baby gets older day by day, don’t stress the small stuff, the milestones, the appointments; go to baby groups, the park and find other parents that will support you. Trust your parenting instinct always and remember your little bundle of joy will be as unique as everyone else so take those photos and videos and give yourself and your child time to get into your routine to begin your journey.

And finally,

‘look forward to the most enthralling, frustrating, beautiful, fulfilled, exciting, worrying, scary, proud, enriching and varied life journey you’ll be privileged to be on with your baby.

• 

  Ellie enjoying a fun day out independently

If reading this has helped you in anyway, please comment below or get in touch with me through any platform via @lintr.ee/shaz_crowley. Thank you to the parents of the above group #WCAT for helping me put this together and as always, thank you for reading.

Until Next Time
Sharon x

Carer’s Allowance and Free Access

Are you a carer, do you know what you are entitled to as a carer? Not sure, then stay with me and read on. Hi I’m Sharon (if reading for the first time) and I am a carer to my daughter Ellie, who is 10 and has Down Syndrome.

A definition of carer in the UK is ‘anyone who cares, unpaid, for a friend or family member who due to illness, disability, a mental health problem or an addiction cannot cope without their support’ according to The Carer’s Trust.

As a carer you are entitled to Carers Allowance, which in the UK is £66.15 a week if you care for someone at least 35 hours a week and they get certain benefits. There are other criteria and please refer to https://www.gov.uk/carers-allowance for assistance.

After speaking to several mums I was curious as to whether this allowance was justified. I know it was needed for our family as it has become the income I lost giving up work, but at the back of my mind was always the thought, ‘why are we entitled to it’ and the next paragraph sums up why every carer is 100% entitled.

Many carers give up work, like myself, and this allowance subsidizes the family income. Some put the money towards travel for additional appointments, many use it for specific items that can help their child; sensory toys, private therapies, specialised clothing/equipment and a few put it towards their children’s future needs. So yes every carer should apply for that allowance.

So now you get the picture about the allowance, let’s talk free access. Now every young child generally can’t go to an attraction on their own, but most teenagers and young adults can however people with Down Syndrome may often need a carer for some supervision and with some help from this fabulous group https://www.facebook.com/groups/DLAchildrensDaysOut/
we have created a list of places where carers go free.
Please see attached as this will be updated

where-carers-go-freeDownload

I would love to know if you have found this useful or if you could add to the list, please comment below and as always thanks for reading.

Until Next Time,
Sharon x

If I Knew Then What I Know Now!

It’s a common saying isn’t it? ‘If only I knew then what I know now’ but this couldn’t be more relevant to me as I recently celebrated my daughters 10th birthday. Ellie was born with Down’s Syndrome and diagnosed a few hours later; for those parents in the same situation you can only imagine the thoughts that ran through my head at that time (but that’s for a different post).

So I wanted to share with you some notions, with the help of other parents, that I wish I had known back then, in case you are reading this as a first time parent.

Ellie on holiday aged 2

One important thing to remember is your child is unique and has your genes, so whilst there will be similarities with others born with Down’s Syndrome they will be more like you than you realise. In addition due to the wide spectrum of learning difficulty in Down’s Syndrome you cannot predict what your child will or won’t be able to do.

From a mum, here are her words “There is no need for fear, my son brings me more joy than anyone ever could…..he makes me proud every single day.”

You may become or you may not fixated with milestones (I sure did) but when your child hits them, and they will in their own unique way; you will be over the moon, jump up and down, record it and cry with laughter 🙂

Other parents with a child with Down’s Syndrome will become your best friends as they understand exactly what you’re going through. I can strongly recommend joining a supportive group as soon as you feel ready (one link is below and another in linktr.ee/shaz_crowley)

Forget the myths and sterotypes; most people with Down’s Syndrome are living a completely different independent life to those from only a few decades ago due to medical progress, interventions, inclusion and technology; Ellie is a whiz on her ipad (see previous blog)
https://sharoncrowley.wordpress.com/2019/05/08/challenging-some-myths-and-stereotypes-around-downs-syndrome/

Yes there will be downs as well as ups, yes there may be lots of appointments, health issues and other additional needs to contend with but from one mum to another; you can do this. Have faith, trust your gut instinct every time and enjoy the delight of being a mum. There will be lots of happiness to come and your child will not only enrich your life but everyone else they meet. They will give you some fresh ideas on life and expectations so believe that everything is going to be alright.

Pouty

A special thank you to the parents of this group (#wouldntchangeathing) for their words of wisdom and insights
https://www.facebook.com/wouldntchangeathingdotorg/

Thank you as always for taking the time to read and if you would like to connect with me, connect via @linktr.ee/shaz_crowley

Until Next Time
Sharon x

Challenging some Myths and Stereotypes around Down’s Syndrome

After having my daughter Ellie I was suddenly surrounded by a lot of outdated facts, myths and stereotypes of Down’s Syndrome; some made me laugh and many I chose to ignore. However 10 years later I have chosen to challenge those myths.
First let share my thoughts as a parent and to offer some education.
Please note everything written here is just my opinion, however many myths have been contributed by other parents.

So let’s begin with the most popular one; all people with Down’s Syndrome are always happy and loving. All I can say here folks is ask a parent! All our children have every emotion just like yours, they are angry, frustrated, cry, have tantrums and can be very annoying (sound familiar?)

• 

Another stereo type that may have come from the medical profession or just an outdated view was when another mum was informed that her child would not come to much. Seriously??? Have you seen the actors, the dancers, the pianists, and not forgetting the legend Sarah Gordy who received a MBE in 2018. Ellie is currently in mainstream primary, can read, do mental maths, spell, and goes to drama with her friends. She has achieved her 100m swimming certificate and recently went on her first field trip with school, without us.

• 

One myth I admit to worrying about when Ellie was born, was what would happen to her as she got older. Yes our children are no longer taken to care homes to be looked after but would she live with us forever. It’s been a lovely surprise to see so many young adults including the awesome Heidi who moved out at 20 to live the life she wants here’s a link to her page
https://www.facebook.com/Heidi-Crowter-Living-the-Dream-473919313091896/

Another common myth about babies with Down’s Syndrome is they simply cannot breastfeed. I admittedly tried only once with Ellie and didn’t pursue it but other mum’s have had no problems showing every child, as we should accept, is unique.

Age; the common stereotype that only older females have children with Down’s Syndrome. I personally was only 34 (I don’t consider that old, do you?) and statistics show there are more females under the age of 35 than older that have children with Down’s Syndrome. Down’s Syndrome is a chromosome abnormality and therefore has little to do with age.

Children with Down’s Syndrome stay babies for longer, have you heard this – many parents might feel like this when given the diagnosis due to stereotypes, but again ask a parent if you want the truth. I feel Ellie turned into a teenager when she was 7 with all the same fun attributes of moodiness, stubbornness and emotions that you would expect from those teenage years. Others have said the same. Many parents teach their children age appropriate behaviour to try to dispel this myth.

All people with Down’s Syndrome look the same. Yes many children have similar facial features (slanted eyes, small nose), a smaller stature and may need support with their gross, motor and oral skills; however each child is unique and will have similarities to their parents and siblings just as much.

So there you have it, some very common myths and stereotypes of Down’s Syndrome challenged. My last thought on this matter is terminology; a person is a person not a Down’s Syndrome person or a Down’s; a better way of saying something that is similar is ‘Here is Ellie, she has Down’s Syndrome’ – person first.

Thank you for reading and as always if you would like to connect, connect with me via linktr.ee/shaz_crowley.
Do you think I’ve missed one out, comment below? Until next time,
Sharon x

Taking Action

Taking action to achieve your goals is imperative but what if you don’t have any goals or understand what you want to do, how can you? Last week I wrote about my next chapter titled ‘The Next Chapter’ which you can see here
https://sharoncrowley.wordpress.com/2019/04/24/changing-attitudes/
so this week I will start to explain what I have been doing.

My first investigation was to see where I could go locally that was dog free as my daughter Ellie, who has Down’s Syndrome is frightened to death of dogs. Whilst we, as parents, work closely with her to encourage her to be brave and to let dogs walk on by. It was beginning to feel disheartening to find many let their dogs off leads in public and more recently I spotted a dog in our local children’s park. That was the last straw, as they say and the day I began to take action. I emailed, telephoned and researched and then went live on Facebook with Ellie to explain our findings (see here)
https://www.facebook.com/sharon.crowley.14/videos/vb.707793674/10157347055773675/?type=3

Next stage; journalling which began on a daily basis, often twice a day, just writing down my thoughts, what I wanted to achieve in life, who was I, could I inspire or motivate others? During this time I felt that most children with Down’s Syndrome were supported very well from birth through therapists, community groups and lots of resources from the Down’s Syndrome Association but I felt it was a different story once they became teenagers and this was something I wanted to address.

However after various conversations and finding a Facebook group which provided this support, for secondary school age (see here)
https://www.facebook.com/search/top/?q=fod%20secondary%20school%20age%20support&epa=SEARCH_BOX
it appears there is plenty of material out there, just maybe not advertised as much which I could find and share.

I then turned my attention to social activities as I didn’t believe I had seen many for teenagers with Down’s Syndrome, but once again there are a few but still a lot of work in this area needs to be addressed. A local Down’s Syndrome group advertises such activities in the South Manchester area, (see here)
https://www.facebook.com/SMDSSG
and these include movie nights, pizza nights and plenty of football action can be seen at Manchester City. In addition, I am hoping to restart our local Bury support group and work closely with parents to see what other ways we, as parents and carers can support our children to help them reach their full potential and be included in the community.

Activities

So that’s me for this week, until next time. Feel free to connect with me via @linktr.ee/shaz_crowley or share to anyone that may also find these links useful and thank you, as always, for reading.
Sharon x

Changing Attitudes

When you find your passion, the reason to get out of bed each morning, you will give it 100% focus and make plans and take continuous action. This is what I have found recently, as I became a little jaded with the path I was on so therefore I took some time out and now I am back to begin the next chapter of my work from home journey.

What has changed?
Let me introduce myself especially if this is the first time you are reading my blog. I’m Sharon, mum of two and full time carer to my daughter, Ellie who will be 10 next month. Ellie has Down’s Syndrome and my life changed direction when I gave birth to her. Not only did I become a new mum at 34, but I had a child with a disability and a disability until then that I had not heard of.
Fast forward ten years and I am now a work from home mum. I take both children to school, to their clubs and not missing Ellie’s appointments. After being in work full time since I was 16, becoming a full time housewife was not for me and as such an enjoyable journey working from home. Three and a half years of Network Marketing has helped me build a network of friends, business skills and a lot of social media tips but the passion for me wasn’t there in the end.

Meet Ellie & Billy

Which brings me right up to today. After a coaching call with @LeonaBurton from #mumsinbusinessassociation I was advised to journal daily and reflect on what I enjoy, what excited me, what I don’t enjoy too and with a tonne of personal development daily I chose to find ‘me’ again. I want to find something I can do that will help others, something that is inspiring to others and that brings me to sharing my version of ‘Changing Attitudes’, the inspiration derived from my children. I am now on a mission to help, with many others, change the attitudes towards people with Down’s Syndrome. In addition, help my daughter and others feel accepted, included and above all reach their full potential.

Do I know how, not yet? But isn’t that the exciting part? I’ve taken the first step and put this blog out there for you to read and I hope you will follow my journey as I plan to play big and share regular tips, ideas and inspirational stories from now on.

Thank you for reading, if you would like to connect with me, you can via linktr.ee/shaz_crowley and comment below if you know someone that has Down’s Syndrome.

Sharon x